


it's 3am, stay by me

by cloudfromffvii



Category: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: M/M, additional tags to be added as it's updated, alcohol m for chapter 5, chpt 8 is soulmate au, cloud is also trans, cloud strife has ptsd, ideally lots of fluff, my bad it was chpt 5, no arguments, not all canon compliant, obviously, there's a mermaid one now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-02-09 21:10:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 3,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18646177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cloudfromffvii/pseuds/cloudfromffvii
Summary: a bunch of zack/cloud drabbles i've been writing when i can't sleep. so they're raw, no proof-reading. mostly with prompts from tumblrs that i'll credit in the notessome canon-compliant, some not. some angst, but hopefully mostly fluffy. no rhyme or reason, just disjointed drabbles about two men that love and care for each other





	1. ghosts

**Author's Note:**

> here we go here's the first one!
> 
> this one's canon compliant. cloud has ptsd and a dissociative disorder.
> 
> prompt was "You were tossing and turning all night. You okay?" from justmorerpmemes.

“You were tossing and turning last night. You okay?”

The voice was soft as the blond blinked his eyes open, wrinkling his nose at the cold morning sunlight trickling in through a crack in the curtains. He never pulled the damn things shut properly; at least with his bed moved it didn’t hit him in the face anymore. Cloud pushed himself up onto one elbow with a yawn.

“Fine,” he croaked, clearing his throat and rubbing the sleep from each eye with his thumb. The warmth (or was it just pressure?) from the man sitting on the edge of his bed was comforting despite his morning demeanour. “Same old bullshit. Don’t you get tired of asking?”

“Of course not, don’t be silly!” The gentle touch of fingers tenderly breezing through his hair made the man want to just lie back down, but he shoved himself up properly and folded his legs. “You don’t want to talk about it?”

“The nightmares are  _ literally _ always the same, man. Rehashing them out loud isn’t gonna do shit.”

“Alright, alright.” Regardless of how little a morning person Cloud was, Zack’s bright laughter always managed to soothe his temper to some degree. “I’ll let you get dressed ‘n stuff. Don’t forget to actually eat breakfast, alright?”

“Sure thing,  _ mum _ .”

“Haha, fuck off. And don’t forget, I love you.”

“.... I love you too.”

The weight from the bed was gone now. Cloud didn’t bother looking up as he shoved the duvet back and swung his legs off the edge of the bed.

**You know he’s probably not there,** said a voice, the cadet in his head.  **You never even check.**

“No shit,” Cloud grumbled back, voice alone in the empty room as he spoke to himself. (One of them, at least.) Hauling himself up off the bed, he shuffled over to his dresser to find a shirt, and only let his eyes linger on the bandage-wrapped sword by the door for a moment. “Doesn’t matter where he is, he can hear me. Aeris taught me that.”


	2. way too early

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> no, it's still dark out, it's not time to get up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> updates for this drabble collection thing will be sporadic, sorry about that lmao
> 
> prompt for this one was "No, it's still dark out. It's not time to get up." from justmorerpmemes

Sometimes it took forever for Zack to wake up in the mornings; Cloud would sometimes spend a good half hour- maybe more- just trying to wake the man up, let alone coax him out of bed. Zack may have been a morning person, but his circadian rhythm often dictated that ‘morning’ fell at about 11:30am.

Sometimes though, his sleep was light.

Zack definitely wasn’t the first to wake, but the moment his boyfriend began to move to sit up, he reached an arm around his waist to halt him. “Where’re you goin’,” he mumbled, face still deep in his pillow and voice thus muffled. The blond smiled and leaned down, pressing a kiss to the man’s temple before continuing his move. The arm around his waist tightened.

“I’m going to go play something in the lounge, I can’t sleep.”

“But it’s not geddup time yet…”

“Well, it is for me.”

Cracking one blue eye open, Zack cast a glance over at the window- their curtains were dark, but they were piss poor at keeping the light out. And the sun was definitely not over the horizon yet. “No, sun’s not up. S’not geddup time yet.” Rolling his eyes, Cloud leaned in and pushed Zack’s fringe out of his face.

“What if I get you a kiss. Can I go videogame then?”

He might have pouted when he huffed, but with his face buried in his pillowcase it was hard to tell. Especially in the dark. “No. Cuddle time now.”

As if to prove his point, the man rolled over and reached both arms out as an invitation. Cloud elected to lean straight over him instead, searching blindly with his hand on the beside. His partner was clearly unsatisfied with this, as he felt strong arms wrap around his waist defiantly- though Zack didn’t pull him down.

“Alright, alright, just lemme grab my phone, then.”

Another awkward minute holding himself up and fumbling around later, Cloud settled himself back down on his back, phone in hand as his boyfriend cuddled up against his side and pulled him close.It took a bit of elbowing and shuffling to get comfortable, but by the time he’d situated himself Zack was snoring next to him, face nuzzled into his shoulder.


	3. aquarium

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> here's one for mermay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt for this one was "Living in an aquarium isn't so bad..." from memeasaurus-promptus

“I mean, there  _ are _ bigger enclosures here, but this really doesn’t bother me. The others need them more than I do.”

None of the visitors thought the tank was particularly small, but it really wasn’t enough. It was a pretty common topic. The aquarium itself didn’t actually have many  _ exhibits _ , per se- the only permanent enclosures were creatures that couldn’t be rereleased for myriad reasons. The rest were recovering from injuries or other circumstances until they could be. It was open, with a cover that could be pulled over if need be, though that took a lot of time and work so they usually didn’t bother unless the weather got  _ really _ bad.

Cloud’s breaks were spent sitting up on the top platform (used for observation, mostly) overlooking the tank in question, drinking his coffee and eating whatever he’d brought with him while the inhabitant of the enclosure sat with him, blue-black-green scales glistening in the sun. Said scales lessened and stopped at his waist, but continued up his back and behind his shoulders. Sparkling black and blue even framed parts of his face. 

Zack’s tail was long with two long, fresh scars running down the left, and his fins were delicate; a dorsal running from his shoulders down to the mid-point of his tail, two pelvic fins running down the front of his tail and a caudal fin that had  _ definitely _ seen better days. One side of the tail fin and one pelvic fin both were riddled with holes, though not looking as tattered as when he’d first gotten in there.

“They’re talking about maybe  _ not _ letting you go,” Cloud said plainly, before taking a drink. Again, a pretty common topic now. “Making you a ‘permanent resident’.”

“Is that because they’re worried my whole tail situation, or because they want to keep me for some freaky sorta research?” Zack was grinning, but Cloud wasn’t. The mermaid reached up with a webbed hand and flicked water at his companion. “Don’t look like that. I know that’s not the sort of place this is.”

“But like… how do you  _ feel _ about that?”

The mermaid thought for a moment, folding his arms to rest on the platform and letting his tail just drift limply below him. “I’m… not sure. I guess I might not really feel much about it until they actually make a decision. I mean, until I can swim right I couldn’t go back out there anyway.”

“I don’t… think things like you should be cooped up.”

“Aw, living in an aquarium isn’t  _ that _ bad,” and the mermaid was back to laughing, waving a hand dismissively. “And besides. If they do decide that, they might change their minds later on.”


	4. in the canyon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> road trip to cosmo canyon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt for this one was "It's too hot to sleep, but I don't want to start the day." from justmorerpmemes

Staying in Cosmo Canyon was a mistake.

Visiting friends was  _ never _ a mistake in Zack’s  _ very _ good and  _ definitely _ objective and  _ never _ wrong opinion, but the little assfuck nowhere backwater town  _ he _ grew up in wasn’t nestled right at the foot of an alpine mountain range. Where he managed (if not thrived), Cloud ended up little more than a sweaty, dazed mess for most of the day.

(Not even Costa del Sol was this bad. At least it had the sea breeze. Why couldn’t they have all met there? Or Mideel. Mideel was nice and safe and temperate.)

It always felt like the sun rose earlier in the canyon than on other parts of the continent, and the heat started far earlier than that. The nights could be unforgivingly chilly in some parts of the year, and the change at dawn and dusk was stark; this, unfortunately or not, was not one of those times. It had been sweltering all fucking night, too.

Even Zack was feeling it. Sunlight was pouring in through the paneless window, but it wasn’t what had woken him. And with the way it was washing over him, he could tell he wasn’t getting back to sleep. Time to start the day, then!

The heat was  _ dry _ , and it was the only saving grace. Didn’t help that there was another body plastered to him, radiating his own heat and adding to the problem. Using one hand and doing his best to  _ gently _ peel Cloud’s arm off his chest, the older man braced himself.

“S’too hot,” came the foggy grumble as the blond rolled onto his back, cracking his eyes open and giving a disgusted groan as he fumbled for the blanket to try and wipe the heat away. Sweat between his thighs and his tits wasn’t anything new, but having slept pressed up against his partner all fucking night for  _ some _ gods-forsaken reason, it was all the way down his torso. “Why’d you wake me up?”

“Sorry, babe. Go back to sleep, you sound like you need it.”

“It is  _ too _ hot for that,” he snorted, giving up with the sheet (now even more damp than when it started) and tossing it to the end of the bed. The thought of showering flashed through Cloud’s mind, immediately followed by the realisation that he was going to have to shower  _ again _ later- and then his thoughts were interrupted.

“Then get up and come get breakfast with me,” his boyfriend offered, extending a hand with the intention of helping Cloud sit up. The blond glowered at him for a second, before rolling onto his front.

“It is  _ way _ too early-”

“You don’t even know what the time-”

“- to get up,  _ fuck _ that.”

Rolling back onto his side, Cloud didn’t even have a second to register what was going on before he was bundled up in the damp sheet and lifted off the mattress and into his partner’s arms. Zack only laughed at the blond’s irritated squawking, setting him down on his feet once he stopped squirming and pressing a kiss to his forehead.

“I fucking hate you.”

“I know, sweetheart. Get dressed and we’ll go grab some food.”


	5. party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> zack's the life of the party. cloud doesn't like parties.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt for this one was "God, I think you're the most attractive person in this room. Next to me, of course." from inkedsnow

He  _ loved _ parties. Zack was  _ born _ to party, and his best friend threw the best parties he’d ever been to. Not just because she was his best friend, of course; blunt and take-no-shit as she was, Aeris was a social butterfly and was very good at bridging the gap between people that didn’t usually get along.

That’s how he’d gotten over here. She’d found him hanging out with a friend and called for him, slipping her arm around his and pulled him away from the conversation with an afterthought apology over her shoulder. It wasn’t a big deal- the night was young and everyone was still finding the clique they wanted to spend the party with.

She’d offered him something fruity and alcoholic and he’d happily accepted, before being dragged across the lounge. Her girlfriend’s friend was here, she’d explained, because Tifa didn’t like coming to parties alone. But he’s opted to just sit on the couch and brood instead of getting to know anyone now that Tifa’s started coming out of her shell. So could Zack go and spend some time with him, maybe help open up a little?

Of course he could!

And that’s why he was here now, three cocktails in, arm along the back of the couch and not  _ quite _ around his new friend’s shoulders with his fingers tapping to whatever music was playing, and still trying to chip away at whatever social wall the pretty blond had put up.

Guy didn’t even seem to be buzzed.

“You sure can hold your liquor, huh?” What was this, the fourth topic he’d tried? “Pretty impressive, honestly, for such a little guy.” Cloud frowned and sank back into the couch, folding one leg over the other as he took a sip of his own drink. Which number was he even on? “Wait, shit. That might have been patronising- fuck man, my bad.”

“It’s fine,” came the flat response. “I usually drink stronger shit, that’s all.”

They lapsed into an awkward silence  _ again, _ and Zack groaned inwardly. This really was not going well. Cloud stared into his glass for a few moments, before looking up at his companion.

“I would’ve thought someone like  _ you _ could hold it a lot better.”

That made the man laugh, and he could’ve sworn he saw his new friend crack a smile. That warmed something deep in his chest, spreading through his entire torso far more thoroughly than it probably would have without the help of his 7% RTDs.

“So, you came over here to talk to me because Aeris made you do it,” the blond continued. Zack raised his eyebrows. “But you didn’t fuck off, despite me trying to ice you out. Why the  _ fuck _ did you bother staying?” Another sip of his vodka mixer. “Kinda impressive.”

“I’m not sure I know,” the dark-haired man said honestly, giving a shrug and taking a gulp of his own drink. “You looked lonely. I’m not a quitter, sometimes to my own detriment. And you’re kinda cute.”

Normally Zack would have at least thought twice about saying something like that, but his filter had dissolved in his second glass. Now he was just buzzed enough to employ it. Cloud would have spluttered if he’d been drinking at that moment.

“Honestly…  _ God _ , I think you’re the most attractive person in this whole room. Except me, of course.”

This time Cloud reacted, giving him a light punch in the shoulder. He was smiling, regardless of whether he wanted to be or not. “You think flattery’s going to get you any further than you’ve already gotten?”

“S’not a crime to try, is it?”


	6. nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ptsd nightmares are shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt for this one was "It's okay, you don't need to talk right now." from justmorerpmemes

He wasn’t sure how long they’d been curled up there together, blankets bundled around him and Cloud haphazardly draped in his lap. The man was curled into his chest, huddled tight with his knees up, head tucked safely under Zack’s chin as he rocked him gently. 

His breath was still hitching and his cheeks were still damp and his nose was still running, but he wasn’t crying anymore and that was an improvement. 

Zack’d even call it a victory.

The quiet crying hadn’t been what’d woken the older man up; no, it was the hand scrabbling at his shoulder, fingers catching in his shirt and pulling him, yanking him out of his sleep as his boyfriend tossed and clung and mumbled to himself, eyes shut tight and tears already on his pillow. Waking Cloud from a dream like that was a delicate business, but tonight Zack had made relatively quick work of it.

Wrapping his arms around him and pulling him tight, he’d repeated the blond’s name over and over again as gently as he could until the struggling lessened and he finally jerked his head up, eyes wide and scared and it absolutely  _ wrecked _ Zack’s heartstrings to see the man like that-

But from there it only took him a minute to hush him, sitting up and coaxing him into his lap (where he’d be  _ safe _ , he promised,) as the shocked terror gave way to sobbing and eventually to the stressed quiet they were sitting in now. Sometimes music helped, but their laptop was in the lounge and Cloud’s phone was too far for Zack to reach without disturbing him, so in the quiet they sat.

“You’re alright,” he soothed, rubbing a firm hand over the smaller man’s back. Cloud didn’t respond, simply drawing himself a little tighter into his little ball. Whatever images had been playing in his sleep were still burned in there behind his eyelids; Zack could tell by the little tremble in his shoulders and the way he was fidgeting with his hands. “I’m right here, you’ve got nothing to worry about, babe.”

The quiet was uncomfortable for both of them.

“Did you want to tell me about it?” There was a sharp shake of the head underneath his chin and Zack sighed, sliding his arm all the way around him and giving him a gentle squeeze. “Alright, babe. It’s cool, you don’t have to talk right now.”

He wanted to ask for specifics- even just for yes or nos, so he could get an  _ idea _ \- but he bit it back. Lately there hadn’t been much variation in the nightmares anyway; lab equipment, being submerged in bright green until he couldn’t breathe, not knowing who or where or  _ why _ he was- they’d talked about it enough in the brightness of day.

So he just sat as patiently as he could, mumbling little reminders that he was safe and that he was loved until Cloud finally raised his head to rest it against Zack’s shoulder instead. The man gave him a smile and leaned in, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“You doing okay,” he asked softly, “now that you can think a lil’ bit?” A short nod was his only response, before the man started repositioning himself. “Man, if you got snot on my shirt I am going to be  _ pissed _ .”

Zack could’ve sworn he almost heard a laugh. He waited for an actual response, but it seemed like his boyfriend wasn’t vocal yet. All good.

“I’ll go get you some toilet paper,” Zack explained, slowly maneuvering the pair of them until he was able to slip out from under the smaller man, tucking the blankets around him before getting to his feet. A shaky hand darted out to grab his forearm and he immediately leaned in, still smiling. “Don’t worry, I’ll be right back. I’ll grab your laptop on the way and we can watch some of those happy animal vines or something, yeah?”

He barely saw the nod in the dark.


	7. dreary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cloud doesn't like the rain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt for this one was "Oh look, it's dreary outside. Just like my mood." from justmorerpmemes

He fucking hated winter. Wind and rain and the steadily dropping temperature made going to work, leaving the house,  _ getting out of bed _ all harder than any of them needed to be. Summer wasn’t exactly all that much better, really, but he didn’t have to  _ deal _ with summer right now.

Comfy pants, boyfriend’s thick knit jersey, bundled up on the couch with the duvet from their bed wrapped around him- all things one would reasonably expect to help improve a mood and none of it was working. Cloud wasn’t surprised. He could be pretty resistant to thinks like ‘cheering up’ and ‘being happy’. Sometimes just to be contrary.

Zack was antithesis of everything Cloud was right at that moment. And a good thing, too; entering the lounge, he handed his boyfriend a mug of milky coffee, before pulling open the curtains the blond hadn’t bothered to. Cold light flooded into the lounge from a seriously overcast sky, threatening- oh yeah- more rain.

“Oh look,” he stated, not even thinking to thank his partner (not that Zack seemed to have noticed- or care), “it’s dreary outside. Again. Just like my mood.” He paused and took a sip of the coffee, looking up to Zack and frowning a little. “Again.”

“Yeah, that happens sometimes,” he said back, turning their television on and earning himself an annoyed noise as he pulled the blanket away from Cloud just long enough to settle himself under it. Movie time.

“Thanks,” Cloud finally muttered, taking another gulp and snuggling back down into the blanket properly. He should have brought a pillow out with him. “For the coffee. Not for the curtains.”

Zack just flashed him a smile before leaning in, pressing a little kiss to his hair. “I know you hate winter, but I really don’t mind it.” Cloud glanced up at him with an eyebrow raised. “Every day, a whole sky full of grumpy clouds and yet the best one is right here with me, where he belongs.”


	8. freckles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cloud has a lot of freckles, and they're one of zack's favourite things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> soulmate au!
> 
> the prompt for this one was "Every time your soulmate thinks about/wishes they’d met you already a mark appears on your body in a tally." from thingsforrp

Their hands fit together perfectly. The first time they’d touched, the first time they’d spoken, it was like they’d already known each other for a lifetime, if not more. They even filled in where the other lacked; wherever Cloud couldn’t smile, Zack was there with a beaming grin. Whenever Zack had too much going on at once to keep up with his own thoughts, Cloud was there to sit him down and help him sort it out.

For the first couple of weeks, though, something had been nagging at him. It was a well known fact that long before- weeks, months, even years- you’d ever met your soulmate, marks would begin to form on their skin. It was different for everyone- scars were common, little coloured marks too, there was even a report of someone ultimately ending up with what looked like leopard rosettes all over their back before travelling countries and finding their counterpart.

Zack’s were mostly scars. Little scratches he didn’t remember getting. Cat scratches on his hands, though he didn’t have one (or tend to play with others- allergies). Scrapes on his shins or his knees, though he swore he never knocked himself on anything. And they never hurt. It wasn’t the most  _ romantic _ sort of marks he could have developed, but he cherished every single one of them.

And once he’d met Cloud and they’d gotten to know each other, the nature of the marks became incredibly clear. He had a lot to work through- just like Zack, though the blond’s methods of working through issues were often a lot less effective. But that had improved since they’d met. That wasn’t what bothered him.

What bothered him was that he just could not, for the life of him, figure out what kind of marks he’d caused his soulmate. He wasn’t about to just  _ ask _ \- that would have been  _ rude _ . Every scar Cloud had, he could account for himself- even if he didn’t remember it, he had his close friend to vouch for the aftermath. So that couldn’t be it.

(If nothing else, Zack was glad those weren’t the marks he’d left.)

The other day, though, Cloud mentioned something and everything  _ finally _ made sense. He’d been looking at his arms idly while Zack watched a video. Freckles aren’t genetic, are they, he’d asked. Zack had paused his video and thought.

They kinda are, he’d said. If your parents have freckles, you’ll pro’lly have freckles.

Cloud had then said pretty bluntly that his parents didn’t have freckles. He didn’t know his grandparents, but they didn’t have them in their pictures either. Zack had made a little noise, because he didn’t really have anything to say to that. What  _ did _ you say to that?

_ Then, _ Cloud mentioned that his freckles first started appearing when he was 12.

A couple on his shoulders, a couple on his face. By the time he’d hit 17, his arms, his face,  his shins, were all covered. By the time he was 21, even the parts of his skin that rarely saw the sun were splattered with freckles.

Suddenly, that nagging worry Zack had deep down in his gut felt like it had never existed at all.


End file.
